Tuesday, August 3, 2010

nightmare: house of mirrors

my apt in a building full of mirrors pay parking lot I couldn't find my slip the front desk kept calling to tell me to move/pay my bill that my visa had 'relinquished' the funds the elevator full of mirrors too fast painfully bright sneaking off to my car panicking finding my wallet money books phone little writing books strewn around the car keys still in the ignition can't find my ticket emily haines playing full blast 'lack of light' roaming homeless men in the garage as they shut down the lights in the garage one doesn't believe me when I say there's nothing of value in the car keeps menacing comes closercloser telling me to look at the wound on his head I feel horror won't he hits me I run into the elevator where he can't follow hallway outside my apt full of mirrors realise my keys are still in the ignition downstairs water leaks into the carpet from the ceiling a flood panic can't breathe try to call you but you won't answer someone else picks up says 'christine can't this wait?' I gasp 'yes oh yes oh oh sor-rree yes' hangup can't breathe the sound of the water dripping phone vibrates you call me back ask what's up I gasp out that I'm stuck in the hallwayabout the parking lot man the water that I'm having a panic attack that delusional that I've lost my mind can't thinkcan't breathedon't know what to do or where to go wonder if I should call 911/go to hospital I want you to take me to emergency intense crazy panicked nothing makes sense all literal storylines warp water incessant you disconnect don't respond but I can still hear you moving on the other end of the line cluttery car noises conversation w/ other peopleI can't breathe gasp ‘____ ______ ____ please please' only you won't respond I wake up my heart explodes.

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